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Episode Transcript: The Algae’s Always Greener
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| − | Episode Article: [[The | + | Episode Article: [[The Algae’s Always Greener]] |
==Characters== | ==Characters== | ||
| − | *[[Plankton]] | + | *[[Sheldon J. Plankton|Plankton]] |
| − | *[[SpongeBob]] | + | *[[SpongeBob SquarePants|SpongeBob]] |
| − | *[[Squidward]] | + | *[[Squidward Tentacles|Squidward]] |
| − | *[[Mr. Krabs]] | + | *[[Eugene H. Krabs|Mr. Krabs]] |
*[[Karen]] | *[[Karen]] | ||
*[[Pearl]] | *[[Pearl]] | ||
| Line 32: | Line 32: | ||
(Walks over to condiment island, and put ketchup on his tray. Plankton is in the ketchup bottle.)<br> | (Walks over to condiment island, and put ketchup on his tray. Plankton is in the ketchup bottle.)<br> | ||
| − | Plankton: Ha ha haaa! Ooh hoo! | + | Plankton: Ha ha haaa! Ooh hoo! You’re all mine you sweet Krabby Patty. Ooh hoo ooh ha ha ha ha ha!<br> |
(Alarm goes off inside the ketchup bottle, and Plankton buckles himself.)<br> | (Alarm goes off inside the ketchup bottle, and Plankton buckles himself.)<br> | ||
| Line 38: | Line 38: | ||
Plankton: Initiating launch sequence. Krabby Patty, here I come!<br> | Plankton: Initiating launch sequence. Krabby Patty, here I come!<br> | ||
| − | Old Man Jenkins: Eh, eh... I hope I | + | Old Man Jenkins: Eh, eh... I hope I don’t miss again.<br> |
| − | Plankton: Reunited, and | + | Plankton: Reunited, and it’s gonna feel so good!<br> |
(Old Man Jenkins missed again, as Plankton goes flying across the restaurant)<br> | (Old Man Jenkins missed again, as Plankton goes flying across the restaurant)<br> | ||
| Line 52: | Line 52: | ||
(Mr. Krabs hides next to his desk for protection.)<br> | (Mr. Krabs hides next to his desk for protection.)<br> | ||
| − | Mr. Krabs: Squidward | + | Mr. Krabs: Squidward, where are you? Shield me with your forhead!<br> |
(Plankton finally lands right next to the desk, and Mr. Krabs picks him up.)<br> | (Plankton finally lands right next to the desk, and Mr. Krabs picks him up.)<br> | ||
Mr. Krabs: So, it was a just another failed Krabby Patty theft attempt by my arch competitor, Plankton! For a second there, | Mr. Krabs: So, it was a just another failed Krabby Patty theft attempt by my arch competitor, Plankton! For a second there, | ||
| − | I misstook you for a threat. But | + | I misstook you for a threat. But you’re just a dirty little man. (Mr. Krabs flicks Plankton away.)<br> |
Mr. Krabs: So long, shrimp!<br> | Mr. Krabs: So long, shrimp!<br> | ||
| Line 63: | Line 63: | ||
(An actual shrimp who was exiting the Krusty Krab, turns around. Plankton is in mid-air.)<br> | (An actual shrimp who was exiting the Krusty Krab, turns around. Plankton is in mid-air.)<br> | ||
| − | Plankton: Curse you, Mr. Krabs! | + | Plankton: Curse you, Mr. Krabs! Ouch.<br> |
| − | (Plankton | + | (Plankton finally lands in the Chum Bucket. He walks in sighing.)<br> |
Karen: So, typical day of failure, I see, huh darling?<br> | Karen: So, typical day of failure, I see, huh darling?<br> | ||
| − | Plankton: Oh, can it, computer | + | Plankton: Oh, can it, computer wife. Can’t you see I’m exhausted? Why don’t you go make yourself useful and synthesize me |
up some grub?<br> | up some grub?<br> | ||
Karen: Yes, your majesty.<br> | Karen: Yes, your majesty.<br> | ||
| − | (Holographic meatloaf appears on the table that | + | (Holographic meatloaf appears on the table that Plankton’s sitting at.)<br> |
Plankton: What do we got here? Oh, goody. Holographic meatloaf again! When am I gonna get some real food? Mr. Krabs gets to | Plankton: What do we got here? Oh, goody. Holographic meatloaf again! When am I gonna get some real food? Mr. Krabs gets to | ||
| − | eat real food. Just look at his daughter, | + | eat real food. Just look at his daughter, she’s a big as a whale. I wish I could be successful like Mr. Krabs. I wish I |
| − | could somehow just switch lives with him. Just to know what | + | could somehow just switch lives with him. Just to know what it’s like.<br> |
| − | Karen: Then why | + | Karen: Then why don’t you just use that "Switch-Lives-Just-To-Know-What-It’s-Like-O-Mogrifier" thing you built last Tuesday? |
<br> | <br> | ||
| − | Plankton: What a brilliant idea! Your parents must have been like, part computer or something | + | Plankton: What a brilliant idea! Your parents must have been like, part computer or something.<br> |
| − | (Plankton sits down in front of the Switch-Lives-Just-To-Know-What- | + | (Plankton sits down in front of the Switch-Lives-Just-To-Know-What-It’s-Like-O-Mogrifier.)<br> |
| − | Plankton: Now, | + | Plankton: Now, let’s see.<br> |
| − | (A picture of a dolphin shows up on the Switch-Lives-Just-To-Know-What- | + | (A picture of a dolphin shows up on the Switch-Lives-Just-To-Know-What-It’s-Like-O-Mogrifier.)<br> |
Plankton: No... no...<br> | Plankton: No... no...<br> | ||
| Line 107: | Line 107: | ||
(Plankton stops to get a drink of soda, then starts screaming again. Later, Plankton wakes up at Mr. Krabs' desk.)<br> | (Plankton stops to get a drink of soda, then starts screaming again. Later, Plankton wakes up at Mr. Krabs' desk.)<br> | ||
| − | Plankton: Ugh... dear Neptune above, what happened last night? Huh, | + | Plankton: Ugh... dear Neptune above, what happened last night? Huh, what’s this?<br> |
(Plankton picks up a name plate reading Mr. Plankton.)<br> | (Plankton picks up a name plate reading Mr. Plankton.)<br> | ||
| Line 119: | Line 119: | ||
(Plankton looks out the office windows and sees people eating Krabby Patties.)<br> | (Plankton looks out the office windows and sees people eating Krabby Patties.)<br> | ||
| − | Plankton: | + | Plankton: I’m in the Krusty Krab... which mean the life switcher was a success! The Krusty Krab is mine!<br> |
SpongeBob: Order up! Two deluxe Krabby Patties.<br> | SpongeBob: Order up! Two deluxe Krabby Patties.<br> | ||
| − | ( | + | (Plankton’s eye turns into a Krabby Patty.)<br> |
Plankton: At last!<br> | Plankton: At last!<br> | ||
| Line 139: | Line 139: | ||
SpongeBob: Yes sir!<br> | SpongeBob: Yes sir!<br> | ||
| − | Plankton: | + | Plankton: I’m gonna needto take one of these patties back to my office for um, bun inspection.<br> |
| − | SpongeBob: | + | SpongeBob: I’m afraid you can’t do that Mr. Plankton!<br> |
Plankton: Wh- why not?<br> | Plankton: Wh- why not?<br> | ||
| Line 147: | Line 147: | ||
SpongeBob: Because that patty is for the customer, sir!<br> | SpongeBob: Because that patty is for the customer, sir!<br> | ||
| − | Plankton: The customer? | + | Plankton: The customer? I’ll boil the customer in hot oil, and rip out his...<br> |
| − | ( | + | (SpongeBob’s eyes point to the customer, to stop Plankton.)<br> |
| − | Plankton: I mean uh, yes, of course, for the lovely... customer | + | Plankton: I mean uh, yes, of course, for the lovely... customer.<br> |
(SpongeBob gives Plankton two Krabby Patties.)<br> | (SpongeBob gives Plankton two Krabby Patties.)<br> | ||
| − | SpongeBob: But you can take these patties, sir. I made them in the off chance that | + | SpongeBob: But you can take these patties, sir. I made them in the off chance that you’d decide to instigate some bun |
inspection today, Mr. Plankton, sir!<br> | inspection today, Mr. Plankton, sir!<br> | ||
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(Plankton runs back to his office.)<br> | (Plankton runs back to his office.)<br> | ||
| − | Plankton: All mine, | + | Plankton: All mine, it’s finnaly all mine! The patties, the wealth, the notoriety!<br> |
(Plankton sees SpongeBob in his office.)<br> | (Plankton sees SpongeBob in his office.)<br> | ||
| Line 168: | Line 168: | ||
Plankton: SpongeBob, what do you want?<br> | Plankton: SpongeBob, what do you want?<br> | ||
| − | SpongeBob: Well, | + | SpongeBob: Well, it’s just that it’s Tuesday again, sir, and I was wondering if I could have my, ummm... weekly performance |
review!<br> | review!<br> | ||
| Line 175: | Line 175: | ||
SpongeBob: Oh yes, please sir!<br> | SpongeBob: Oh yes, please sir!<br> | ||
| − | Plankton: Eh, | + | Plankton: Eh, you’re doing fine. Now leave me to my work.<br> |
SpongeBob: But sir!<br> | SpongeBob: But sir!<br> | ||
| Line 183: | Line 183: | ||
SpongeBob: But sir, there must be something I need to improve on. Anything!<br> | SpongeBob: But sir, there must be something I need to improve on. Anything!<br> | ||
| − | Plankton: All right, the sauce. I dunno, | + | Plankton: All right, the sauce. I dunno, you’re using too much sauce, okay? Review’s over.<br> |
| − | ( | + | (SpongeBob’s face changes.)<br> |
SpongeBob: Eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh...<br> | SpongeBob: Eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh...<br> | ||
| − | Plankton: | + | Plankton: What’s the matter with you? All I said was "A little too much sauce." It’s no big deal, really.<br> |
SpongeBob: Eh, eh, eh, eh, eh...<br> | SpongeBob: Eh, eh, eh, eh, eh...<br> | ||
| Line 195: | Line 195: | ||
Plankton: What do you want from me, a promotion? | Plankton: What do you want from me, a promotion? | ||
| − | ( | + | (SpongeBob’s face changes back to normal.)<br> |
SpongeBob: A pro- a promo- a promotion?!<br> | SpongeBob: A pro- a promo- a promotion?!<br> | ||
| − | Plankton: Uh, sure kid, | + | Plankton: Uh, sure kid, you’re uh... you’re on register now.<br> |
SpongeBob: Register!<br> | SpongeBob: Register!<br> | ||
| Line 205: | Line 205: | ||
(SpongeBob leaves. Plankton gets back to the Krabby Patties.)<br> | (SpongeBob leaves. Plankton gets back to the Krabby Patties.)<br> | ||
| − | Plankton: Glad | + | Plankton: Glad that’s over.<br> |
| − | ( | + | (Squidward’s standing at the cash register reading a book, when he realizes that SpongeBob is standing right next to him.) |
<br> | <br> | ||
Squidward: SpongeBob, remember that little talk we had about 'personal space'?<br> | Squidward: SpongeBob, remember that little talk we had about 'personal space'?<br> | ||
| − | SpongeBob: | + | SpongeBob: It’s okay, Squidward. I’m official, look!<br> |
(SpongeBob points out his badge that says Co-Cashier.)<br> | (SpongeBob points out his badge that says Co-Cashier.)<br> | ||
| − | Squidward: | + | Squidward: Co-Cashier?<br> |
(Plankton is sitting at a table with the two Krabby Patties.)<br> | (Plankton is sitting at a table with the two Krabby Patties.)<br> | ||
| − | (Squidward storm in to Mr. | + | (Squidward storm in to Mr. Plankton’s office.)<br> |
| − | Squidward: You | + | Squidward: You can’t do this to me! If you think I’m going to stand out there all day listening to "Blah, blah, blah, blah, |
blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah..." then you must have coral wedged in your frontal lobe!<br> | blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah..." then you must have coral wedged in your frontal lobe!<br> | ||
Plankton: So what do you want me to do about it?<br> | Plankton: So what do you want me to do about it?<br> | ||
| − | Squidward: | + | Squidward: I’d like my view to be a little less yellow, if you know what I mean.<br> |
| − | ( | + | (Squidward’s now the fry cook, standing in front of the grill.)<br> |
Plankton: Hope you like gray.<br> | Plankton: Hope you like gray.<br> | ||
| Line 237: | Line 237: | ||
(Squidward groans. Plankton heads back to his office.)<br> | (Squidward groans. Plankton heads back to his office.)<br> | ||
| − | Plankton: Now, no more intrusions! | + | Plankton: Now, no more intrusions! I’d like the begin writing the memoirs of my success story, so everyone just stat |
the...<br> | the...<br> | ||
| Line 246: | Line 246: | ||
(Plankton is being bounced up and down.)<br> | (Plankton is being bounced up and down.)<br> | ||
| − | Plankton: Oof! Just tell Daddy what you want! Oof! | + | Plankton: Oof! Just tell Daddy what you want! Oof! He’s very busy!<br> |
Pearl: Could I please have a um... an advance on my allowance?<br> | Pearl: Could I please have a um... an advance on my allowance?<br> | ||
| − | Plankton: If | + | Plankton: If it’ll get you out of my antennae. Go crzy.<br> |
(Plankton gives Pearl one dollar.)<br> | (Plankton gives Pearl one dollar.)<br> | ||
| Line 281: | Line 281: | ||
Plankton: I command you to stop that. Stop that and return to your post!<br> | Plankton: I command you to stop that. Stop that and return to your post!<br> | ||
| − | (Plankton pushes his hand is | + | (Plankton pushes his hand is SpongeBob’s chest, in hopes that he’ll stop.)<br> |
| − | Plankton: | + | Plankton: Where’s the off button on this thing?<br> |
(Pearl walks up to Plankton.)<br> | (Pearl walks up to Plankton.)<br> | ||
| − | Pearl: Okay Daddy, I've decided | + | Pearl: Okay Daddy, I've decided I’m gonna run away! Run away and find a new daddy!<br> |
SpongeBob: Soiled it! Soiled it! Soiled it!<br> | SpongeBob: Soiled it! Soiled it! Soiled it!<br> | ||
| Line 297: | Line 297: | ||
Plankton: What, did I say the secret word?<br> | Plankton: What, did I say the secret word?<br> | ||
| − | SpongeBob: No sir, | + | SpongeBob: No sir, he’s back.<br> |
| − | Plankton: | + | Plankton: Who’s back? What?<br> |
(Something red flashed by.)<br> | (Something red flashed by.)<br> | ||
| Line 310: | Line 310: | ||
Plankton: Take cover from what?!<br> | Plankton: Take cover from what?!<br> | ||
| − | ( | + | (SpongeBob’s up in the crow’s nest searching for him.)<br> |
| − | SpongeBob: | + | SpongeBob: He’s around here somewhere.<br> |
(SpongeBob sees the red flash by once again.)<br> | (SpongeBob sees the red flash by once again.)<br> | ||
| Line 320: | Line 320: | ||
Plankton: What? Who? Where? Somebody tell me.<br> | Plankton: What? Who? Where? Somebody tell me.<br> | ||
| − | + | Other Fish: Some say he crawled out from the lowest trench in the ocean.<br> | |
| − | Pearl:And | + | Pearl:And he’s the saltiest of all the sea dogs.<br> |
| − | SpongeBob: | + | SpongeBob: He’s the most hated creature in Bikini Bottom.<br> (It was Mr. Krabs but without his clothes) |
| − | Mr. Krabs: And | + | Mr. Krabs: And he’s finally got a Krabby Patty! Ar, ar, ar, ar! |
Plankton: Krabs? What the barnacle is going on here?<br> | Plankton: Krabs? What the barnacle is going on here?<br> | ||
| − | SpongeBob: | + | SpongeBob: It’s your arch competitor, Krabs. His goal in life is to steal a Krabby Patty and ruin our restaurant.<br> |
| − | Plankton: | + | Plankton: That’s terrible!<br> |
SpongeBob: Yeah, but the worst part is...<br> | SpongeBob: Yeah, but the worst part is...<br> | ||
| − | Plankton: (Krabs lands behind him) Good grief, | + | Plankton: (Krabs lands behind him) Good grief, he’s naked!<br> |
| − | Mr. Krabs: And | + | Mr. Krabs: And he’s finnally got a Krabby Patty! Ar, ar, ar, ar, ar! Clother me if you can, silly landlubbers!<br> |
| − | SpongeBob: | + | SpongeBob: I’m gonna make you eat those words, Krabs!<br> |
(The cash register spins upsidedown, and turns into a place where a cannon is located.)<br> | (The cash register spins upsidedown, and turns into a place where a cannon is located.)<br> | ||
| Line 352: | Line 352: | ||
(Mr. Krabs stops laughing, as he realizes a bra is on him.)<br> | (Mr. Krabs stops laughing, as he realizes a bra is on him.)<br> | ||
| − | Mr. Krabs: Aw, ya got me! Well, at least | + | Mr. Krabs: Aw, ya got me! Well, at least it’s underwire. Here’s your stinkin’ patty!<br> |
(Mr. Krabs throws the Krabby Patty back to SpongeBob.)<br> | (Mr. Krabs throws the Krabby Patty back to SpongeBob.)<br> | ||
| − | SpongeBob: Knick-knack, the | + | SpongeBob: Knick-knack, the patty’s back! You did it, Mr. Plankton. Victory screech!<br> |
(SpongeBob and all the customers start screaming.)<br> | (SpongeBob and all the customers start screaming.)<br> | ||
| − | Plankton: I | + | Plankton: I don’t understand. Is there a gas leak in here?<br> |
Mr. Krabs: Enjoy your victory screech, Plankton, because someday the Krabby Patty formla will be mine!<br> | Mr. Krabs: Enjoy your victory screech, Plankton, because someday the Krabby Patty formla will be mine!<br> | ||
| − | SpongeBob: | + | SpongeBob: You’ll never get this formula, you twisted fiend!<br> |
Mr. Krabs: Oh, but I will. Even if I have to come back tommorow, and the next day, and the next day, and the next day, and | Mr. Krabs: Oh, but I will. Even if I have to come back tommorow, and the next day, and the next day, and the next day, and | ||
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(Plankton rips off his clothes.)<br> | (Plankton rips off his clothes.)<br> | ||
| − | Plankton: | + | Plankton: It’s not worth it, it’s just not worth it! Goodbye everyone, I’ll remember you all in therapy.<br> |
| − | (Plankton presses the button for the Switch-Lives-Just-To-Know-What- | + | (Plankton presses the button for the Switch-Lives-Just-To-Know-What-It’s-Like-O-Mogrifier. He ends up back in the Chum |
Bucket. Holographic meatloaf is on the table.)<br> | Bucket. Holographic meatloaf is on the table.)<br> | ||
| Line 393: | Line 393: | ||
[[Category:Transcript]] | [[Category:Transcript]] | ||
[[Category:Episode Transcripts/Season 3]] | [[Category:Episode Transcripts/Season 3]] | ||
| − | |||
| − | |||
Latest revision as of 19:12, 29 May 2025
| Back Episode Transcript | Next Episode Transcript |
|---|---|
| Sandy, SpongeBob and the Worm | SpongeGuard on Duty |
Episode Article: The Algae’s Always Greener
[edit] Characters
[edit] Dialogue
(Scene begins at the Krusty Krab with Old Man Jenkins walking into a poll.)
Old Man Jenkins: Pardon me, young lady.
(Takes glasses off to get a better look.)
Old Man Jenkins: Oh, what a fox!
(Walks over to condiment island, and put ketchup on his tray. Plankton is in the ketchup bottle.)
Plankton: Ha ha haaa! Ooh hoo! You’re all mine you sweet Krabby Patty. Ooh hoo ooh ha ha ha ha ha!
(Alarm goes off inside the ketchup bottle, and Plankton buckles himself.)
Plankton: Initiating launch sequence. Krabby Patty, here I come!
Old Man Jenkins: Eh, eh... I hope I don’t miss again.
Plankton: Reunited, and it’s gonna feel so good!
(Old Man Jenkins missed again, as Plankton goes flying across the restaurant)
Plankton: Aaaaahhhhhhhhh!
(Plankton darts around the walls in Mr. Krabs' office.)
Mr. Krabs: Ooh, ooh, sweet wampum. Huh! Whazzat? Another one of those drive-by things!
(Mr. Krabs hides next to his desk for protection.)
Mr. Krabs: Squidward, where are you? Shield me with your forhead!
(Plankton finally lands right next to the desk, and Mr. Krabs picks him up.)
Mr. Krabs: So, it was a just another failed Krabby Patty theft attempt by my arch competitor, Plankton! For a second there,
I misstook you for a threat. But you’re just a dirty little man. (Mr. Krabs flicks Plankton away.)
Mr. Krabs: So long, shrimp!
(An actual shrimp who was exiting the Krusty Krab, turns around. Plankton is in mid-air.)
Plankton: Curse you, Mr. Krabs! Ouch.
(Plankton finally lands in the Chum Bucket. He walks in sighing.)
Karen: So, typical day of failure, I see, huh darling?
Plankton: Oh, can it, computer wife. Can’t you see I’m exhausted? Why don’t you go make yourself useful and synthesize me
up some grub?
Karen: Yes, your majesty.
(Holographic meatloaf appears on the table that Plankton’s sitting at.)
Plankton: What do we got here? Oh, goody. Holographic meatloaf again! When am I gonna get some real food? Mr. Krabs gets to
eat real food. Just look at his daughter, she’s a big as a whale. I wish I could be successful like Mr. Krabs. I wish I
could somehow just switch lives with him. Just to know what it’s like.
Karen: Then why don’t you just use that "Switch-Lives-Just-To-Know-What-It’s-Like-O-Mogrifier" thing you built last Tuesday?
Plankton: What a brilliant idea! Your parents must have been like, part computer or something.
(Plankton sits down in front of the Switch-Lives-Just-To-Know-What-It’s-Like-O-Mogrifier.)
Plankton: Now, let’s see.
(A picture of a dolphin shows up on the Switch-Lives-Just-To-Know-What-It’s-Like-O-Mogrifier.)
Plankton: No... no...
(Finally, a picture of a krab shows up.)
Plankton: Ahah!
(Plankton buckles up.)
Plankton: Well, I hate to leave you Karen, but you know what they say... a rolling ston gathers no algae!
(Plankton goes through a hole of space and time.)
Plankton: Ahhhhhhhhh!
(Plankton stops to get a drink of soda, then starts screaming again. Later, Plankton wakes up at Mr. Krabs' desk.)
Plankton: Ugh... dear Neptune above, what happened last night? Huh, what’s this?
(Plankton picks up a name plate reading Mr. Plankton.)
Plankton: Mister Plankton?
(Plankton picks up a picture of Pearl.)
Plankton: Who the Davey?
(Plankton looks out the office windows and sees people eating Krabby Patties.)
Plankton: I’m in the Krusty Krab... which mean the life switcher was a success! The Krusty Krab is mine!
SpongeBob: Order up! Two deluxe Krabby Patties.
(Plankton’s eye turns into a Krabby Patty.)
Plankton: At last!
(SpongeBob delivers food to customer.)
SpongeBob: There you are sir. Two deluxe...
(Plankton appears at the table.)
SpongeBob: Ahoy there, Mr. Plankton.
Plankton: Er, um, hey there, uh SpongeBob. Uh, SpongeBob?
SpongeBob: Yes sir!
Plankton: I’m gonna needto take one of these patties back to my office for um, bun inspection.
SpongeBob: I’m afraid you can’t do that Mr. Plankton!
Plankton: Wh- why not?
SpongeBob: Because that patty is for the customer, sir!
Plankton: The customer? I’ll boil the customer in hot oil, and rip out his...
(SpongeBob’s eyes point to the customer, to stop Plankton.)
Plankton: I mean uh, yes, of course, for the lovely... customer.
(SpongeBob gives Plankton two Krabby Patties.)
SpongeBob: But you can take these patties, sir. I made them in the off chance that you’d decide to instigate some bun
inspection today, Mr. Plankton, sir!
Plankton: Uhh... yes, uh, very nice. Um, thanks.
(Plankton runs back to his office.)
Plankton: All mine, it’s finnaly all mine! The patties, the wealth, the notoriety!
(Plankton sees SpongeBob in his office.)
Plankton: SpongeBob, what do you want?
SpongeBob: Well, it’s just that it’s Tuesday again, sir, and I was wondering if I could have my, ummm... weekly performance
review!
Plankton: Review?
SpongeBob: Oh yes, please sir!
Plankton: Eh, you’re doing fine. Now leave me to my work.
SpongeBob: But sir!
Plankton: I thought I sent you away, Cretin.
SpongeBob: But sir, there must be something I need to improve on. Anything!
Plankton: All right, the sauce. I dunno, you’re using too much sauce, okay? Review’s over.
(SpongeBob’s face changes.)
SpongeBob: Eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh...
Plankton: What’s the matter with you? All I said was "A little too much sauce." It’s no big deal, really.
SpongeBob: Eh, eh, eh, eh, eh...
Plankton: What do you want from me, a promotion?
(SpongeBob’s face changes back to normal.)
SpongeBob: A pro- a promo- a promotion?!
Plankton: Uh, sure kid, you’re uh... you’re on register now.
SpongeBob: Register!
(SpongeBob leaves. Plankton gets back to the Krabby Patties.)
Plankton: Glad that’s over.
(Squidward’s standing at the cash register reading a book, when he realizes that SpongeBob is standing right next to him.)
Squidward: SpongeBob, remember that little talk we had about 'personal space'?
SpongeBob: It’s okay, Squidward. I’m official, look!
(SpongeBob points out his badge that says Co-Cashier.)
Squidward: Co-Cashier?
(Plankton is sitting at a table with the two Krabby Patties.)
(Squidward storm in to Mr. Plankton’s office.)
Squidward: You can’t do this to me! If you think I’m going to stand out there all day listening to "Blah, blah, blah, blah,
blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah..." then you must have coral wedged in your frontal lobe!
Plankton: So what do you want me to do about it?
Squidward: I’d like my view to be a little less yellow, if you know what I mean.
(Squidward’s now the fry cook, standing in front of the grill.)
Plankton: Hope you like gray.
SpongeBob: Hey Squidward, I can see you through this little window!
(Squidward groans. Plankton heads back to his office.)
Plankton: Now, no more intrusions! I’d like the begin writing the memoirs of my success story, so everyone just stat
the...
(Pearl runs inside the Krusty Krab.)
Pearl: Daddy, Daddy, Daddy, Daddy!
(Plankton is being bounced up and down.)
Plankton: Oof! Just tell Daddy what you want! Oof! He’s very busy!
Pearl: Could I please have a um... an advance on my allowance?
Plankton: If it’ll get you out of my antennae. Go crzy.
(Plankton gives Pearl one dollar.)
Pearl: One dollar? You hate me!
(Pearl begins to cry. Plankton has to dodge all of the tears. A tear ends up landing in his mouth, making him a circle. A
fish walks out and angrily flattens him, getting all of the water out.)
Nat: You!
Plankton: Me?
Nat: You think this is funny?
Plankton: In a cosmic sort of way, yes.
Nat: Well, Mr. Funny Man, is this how you get your sick kicks?
Plankton: What? Its just an ordinary Krabby...(scene zooms in to show the patty made with gross-out items) oh my goodness! Squidward!
(Now SpongeBob appears at the table, next to Plankton.)
SpongeBob: I tried Mr. Plankton, I really did.
Plankton: What now?
SpongeBob: A customer ordered a medium drink, and I gave him a large! I gave him a large! I've soiled the good Krusty Krab name! Soiled it! Soiled it! Soiled it! Soiled it! Soiled it! Soiled it! Soiled it! Soiled it! Soiled it!
Plankton: I command you to stop that. Stop that and return to your post!
(Plankton pushes his hand is SpongeBob’s chest, in hopes that he’ll stop.)
Plankton: Where’s the off button on this thing?
(Pearl walks up to Plankton.)
Pearl: Okay Daddy, I've decided I’m gonna run away! Run away and find a new daddy!
SpongeBob: Soiled it! Soiled it! Soiled it!
Plankton: Make it stop!
(An alarm blares.)
Plankton: What, did I say the secret word?
SpongeBob: No sir, he’s back.
Plankton: Who’s back? What?
(Something red flashed by.)
Plankton: What was that?
SpongeBob: Man your stations! Red alert! Red alert! Take cover!
(All the customers scream, and run to take cover.)
Plankton: Take cover from what?!
(SpongeBob’s up in the crow’s nest searching for him.)
SpongeBob: He’s around here somewhere.
(SpongeBob sees the red flash by once again.)
SpongeBob: There he goes!
Plankton: What? Who? Where? Somebody tell me.
Other Fish: Some say he crawled out from the lowest trench in the ocean.
Pearl:And he’s the saltiest of all the sea dogs.
SpongeBob: He’s the most hated creature in Bikini Bottom.
(It was Mr. Krabs but without his clothes)
Mr. Krabs: And he’s finally got a Krabby Patty! Ar, ar, ar, ar!
Plankton: Krabs? What the barnacle is going on here?
SpongeBob: It’s your arch competitor, Krabs. His goal in life is to steal a Krabby Patty and ruin our restaurant.
Plankton: That’s terrible!
SpongeBob: Yeah, but the worst part is...
Plankton: (Krabs lands behind him) Good grief, he’s naked!
Mr. Krabs: And he’s finnally got a Krabby Patty! Ar, ar, ar, ar, ar! Clother me if you can, silly landlubbers!
SpongeBob: I’m gonna make you eat those words, Krabs!
(The cash register spins upsidedown, and turns into a place where a cannon is located.)
SpongeBob: No shoes, no shirt, no service!
(SpongeBob shoots all the clothes out of the cannon at Mr. Krabs. All of them miss.)
Mr. Krabs: Ar, ar, ar, ar, ar!
(Mr. Krabs stops laughing, as he realizes a bra is on him.)
Mr. Krabs: Aw, ya got me! Well, at least it’s underwire. Here’s your stinkin’ patty!
(Mr. Krabs throws the Krabby Patty back to SpongeBob.)
SpongeBob: Knick-knack, the patty’s back! You did it, Mr. Plankton. Victory screech!
(SpongeBob and all the customers start screaming.)
Plankton: I don’t understand. Is there a gas leak in here?
Mr. Krabs: Enjoy your victory screech, Plankton, because someday the Krabby Patty formla will be mine!
SpongeBob: You’ll never get this formula, you twisted fiend!
Mr. Krabs: Oh, but I will. Even if I have to come back tommorow, and the next day, and the next day, and the next day, and
the next day...
(Mr. Krabs leaves the Krusty Krab. Plankton starts sweating.)
Mr. Krabs: And the next day, and the next day, and the next day, and the next day...
(SpongeBob hand Plankton a phone.)
SpongeBob: Phone call, Mr. Plankton.
Mr. Krabs: (In phone)And the next day, and the next day, and the next day, and the next day...
Plankton: Ahhhhhhhhh!
(Plankton rips off his clothes.)
Plankton: It’s not worth it, it’s just not worth it! Goodbye everyone, I’ll remember you all in therapy.
(Plankton presses the button for the Switch-Lives-Just-To-Know-What-It’s-Like-O-Mogrifier. He ends up back in the Chum
Bucket. Holographic meatloaf is on the table.)
Plankton: Holographic meatloaf? My favorite!
(Plankton starts eating it, and is happy again.)
